Tuesday, March 30, 2010

A Mother Bear's Heart

I'm mad this morning...and righteously so. There are a number of reasons what has triggered this. Maybe it's because I thought I was pregnant for the second time and I wasn't...maybe it's because I spent the weekend with my nieces who are adopted from China and I miss them...or maybe it's because I can't seem sometimes, no matter how hard I try, to get the Church of Christ to GO and help orphans. I do know this...all of this has stirred my mother's heart and I feel like a MOTHER BEAR and my children are in harm's way!!!

I commented on a friend's Facebook page yesterday that I have always felt pregnant with orphans. Both of these women were adopting and talking about how their lives and bodies are mimicing natural pregnancies. How about carrying multi-millions in your womb?! 147 million as you go to bed and labor to get up each day?!

I KNOW the reality of this number. I have traveled to multiple countries and seen countless orphanages. Add the number of faces I have met in each orphanage over the years and try sleeping at night, knowing what you know. Knowing what you know, but not having the megaphone you need to get this reality out to the church? Or maybe you have had a megaphone at times, and yet, the church is deaf or involved in their own "AGENDAS" that they think your missions to orphans are threatening or competition to their congregation's hearts and money. That will break your heart!

So, I am here this morning in particular knowing that there are one million orphans in Ghana alone and yet, no one is signing up to go and help these children in Ghana. Or the fact that there are two particular orphanages in Quito, Ecuador who are looking forward to our team coming, yet our team is not forming or coming together.

When I decided, 13 years ago to go on my first mission trip, I decided that if I was going to get out of my comfort zone, then I was REALLY going to do it. I didn't want to go to a country that was easy..so I chose SIBERIA! :) I wanted a REAL experience! And look where I am now because of what God started in my heart on that first trip to Russia. I was amazed at their culture. Everything was new and exciting. The food was rich, the showers were ice cold, the colors were bright, the people were fascinating and the experience was unforgettable.

My favorite day was ministering to the street kids. It was the first time I had ever shared my testimony while someone translated and I was talking to teenage boys. What in the world did I have in common with teenage boys?! But, I just opened my mouth and God filled it. I told them about how once I gave my life to Christ I had no more desire to party or drink as I had once enjoyed. I had no idea that alcoholism was so prevalent in Russia...but these boys had felt the affects of it their whole lives and they eagerly rushed to give their lives to Christ. I will never forget that. The rush and joy I experienced seeing these boys with nothing whose faces lit up as they received the love of their Abba Father for the very first time. God is faithful.

I share all of this this morning with a heavy heart. One that longs to be a mother personally and so I can desperately relate to the longing of these children with no mothers and fathers. I am the bridge God needs right now to hopefully inspire and move you to finally GO and make disciples of all nations. If you don't go like I did when I went to Siberia, there may be children, orphans who will never know the love of their Abba Father. They will never become disciples of His. And this I know Church, we are ALL CALLED TO GO! Matthew 28:19: Therefore GO and make disciples of all Nations...

We need you especially to go to Ecuador and Ghana. If you don't go...who will?! They are lives, forsaken, alone and abandoned. Their hearts cry out each day and night for the love of a mom and dad. If they cannot have a family one day, GOD, their ABBA FATHER is the ONLY ONE who can meet this need. If we do go and introduce them to this loving Father, adopting them into His amazing family and inheritance, how will they ever respond to this invitation? Please go....


  1. Absolutely perfect! Well said and I found myself saying WOW out loud as I read because there were finally words to describe what I feel in my own heart.

    What absolutely kills me is the Ghana children being considered cursed if they are twins or if their mother dies giving birth to them! I cried while telling my husband about them.

    I love the title of this blog post! I can identify so well with it and when I read that you had told a friend that you have always felt pregnant with orphans, it spoke to my heart in a very deep and spiritual way that I hope to pass on to others who just "haven't gotten it".....yet.


  2. Thank you for sharing your heart. My heart is also heavy, but I can't imagine how much more so yours must be because of the knowledge you have from going to many different places. I feel like God has renewed my heart and passion to serve orphans and it has saddened me to think of time that has been wasted. I know God is calling me and preparing me to be more focused on orphan ministry. I am just not sure exactly what that looks like yet.

  3. It is so obvious that you are passionate about your work and your calling. I often feel that frustration in my classroom. As a teacher in a high poverty area, I see too often that people are quick to judge and slow to help. I cried just yesterday with a 250 lb. "teddy bear" of a young man who will not graduate with his class because of a VERY, VERY close exit exam score. It does not matter that he worked diligently and improved greatly and passed all of the other required parts (not to mention the obstacles he has overcome at home)!!! Thank you for your passion and what you are doing. If you want to read a positive story about adoption, check out my post on my blog about the upcoming CR trip. It is goingnotknowing.blogspot.com. My friend and her husband are in China right now meeting their newly adopted little girl. God bless!!!!

  4. I'm humbled by what the Lord is doing even as I read your blog. Close family friends told us of your organization (Visiting Orphans) yesterday. Both of our families are in the process of adopting from Ghana and Jesus is stirring so much more in our hearts than just adoption. I can't say more right now, but please be encouraged. He is faithful. He will send out laborers into His fields.

  5. I feel the same way, expectant all the time. We are waiting to bring home our children and yet I see more … and I want bring home more.

    What about the ones who are sick and need treatment? Or the ones like my own with multiple needs? There are so many conditions too that we as APs place on it, and that makes me … I don't know how it makes me feel when I realize that the #s at our Christian agency aren't any different than at adoption agencies where non-believers are going as clients. Shouldn't they be? Like why are more people not open to little boys?

    I don't know. I have so many questions. Why do the boys wait so long? Just b/c they are boys. Why is that? I don't understand, especially among Christ-followers.

    I feel our church is awakening but not our staff. It makes me mad and sad too.

    I wish I knew the answers. I am sorry Amanda about your pregnancy not happening. I have not been there so I won't try to offer any words. I am so sorry for your grieving heart. God is using even this to mold you into even more of who He wants you to be.